Heavy smokers tend to envy casual smokers. We've all met these characters: 'Oh, I can go all week without a cigarette, it really doesn't bother me.' We think: 'I wish I were like that.' I know this is hard to believe, but no smoker enjoys being a smoker. Never forget:
* No smoker ever decided to become a smoker casual or otherwise,
therefore:
* All smokers feel stupid, therefore:
* All smokers have to lie to themselves and other people in a vain attempt to justify their stupidity.
I used to be a golf fanatic. But I would brag about how often I played and I wanted to play more.
Why do smokers brag about how little they smoke? If that's the true criterion, then surely the true
accolade is not to smoke at all.
If I said to you, 'Do you know, I can go all week without carrots and it doesn't bother me in the
slightest,' You would think I was some sort of nutcase. If I enjoy carrots, why would I want go all
week without them? If I didn't enjoy them, why would I make such a statement? So when a smoker
makes a statement like: 'I can go all week without a cigarette, it really doesn't bother me.' He's
trying to convince both himself and you that he has no problem. But there would be no need to make
the statement if he had no problem. What he is really saying is: 'I managed to survive a whole week
without smoking.' Like every smoker, he was probably hoping that after this he could survive the rest
of his life. But he could only survive a week, and can you imagine how precious that cigarette must
have been, having felt deprived for a whole week?
This is why casual smokers are effectively more hooked than heavy smokers. Not only is the
illusion of pleasure greater, but they have less incentive to quit because they spend less money and
are less vulnerable to the health risks.
Remember, the only pleasure smokers get is to relieve withdrawal pangs and as I have already
explained, even that pleasure is an illusion. Imagine the little nicotine monster inside your body as a
permanent itch so imperceptible that most of the time we aren't even aware of it.
Now if you have a permanent itch, the natural tendency is to scratch it. As our bodies become more
and more immune to nicotine the natural tendency is to chain-smoke.
There are three main factors that prevent smokers from chain-smoking.
1 MONEY, Most cannot afford to.
2 HEALTH. In order to relieve our withdrawal pangs, we have to take a poison. Capacity to
cope with that poison varies with each individual and at different times and situations in his or
her life. This acts as an automatic restraint.
3 DISCIPLINE. This is imposed by society, or the smoker's job, or friends and relatives, or by
the smoker himself as a result of the natural tug of war that goes on in every smoker's mind.
1 used to think of my chain-smoking as a weakness. I couldn't understand why my friends could limit
their intake to ten or twenty a day. I knew I was a very strong-willed person. It never occurred to me
that most smokers are incapable of chain-smoking, you need very strong lungs in order to do it. Some
of these five-a-day smokers that heavy smokers tend to envy smoke five a day because physically
their constitution cannot smoke more, or because they cannot afford to smoke more, or because their
job, or society, or their own hatred of being hooked won't allow them to smoke more.
It may be of advantage at this stage to provide a few definitions.
THE NON-SMOKER. Someone who has never fallen for the trap but should not be complacent. He is a
non-smoker only by the grace of God. All smokers were convinced that they would never become
hooked, and some non-smokers keep trying an occasional cigarette.
THE CASUAL SMOKER There are two basic classifications of casual smokers.
1 The smoker who has fallen for the trap but doesn't realize it. Do not envy such smokers. They are
merely sampling the nectar at the mouth of the pitcher plant and in al I probability will soon be
heavy smokers. Remember, just as all alcoholics started off as casual drinkers, so all smokers
started off as casual smokers.
2 The smoker who was previously a heavy smoker and thinks he cannot stop. These smokers
are the most pathetic of all. They fall into various categories, each of which needs separate
comment.
THE FIVE–A- DAY SMOKER. If he enjoys a cigarette, why does he smoke only five a day? If he
can take it or leave it, why does he bother to smoke at all? Remember, the 'habit' is really banging
your head against the brick wall to make it relaxing when you stop. The five-a-day smoker is
relieving his withdrawal pangs for less than one hour each day. The rest of the day, although he
doesn't realize it, he is banging his head against the wall and does so for most of his life. He is
smoking only five a day because either he cannot afford to smoke more or he is worried about the
health risk. It is easy to convince the heavy smoker that he doesn't enjoy it, but you try convincing
a casual smoker. Anybody who has gone through an attempt to cut down will know it is the
worst torture of all and almost guaranteed to keep you hooked for the rest of your life.
THE MORNING- OR EVENING-ONLY SMOKER. He punishes himself by suffering withdrawal
pangs for half the day in order to relieve them the other half. Again, ask him why, if he enjoys a
cigarette, he doesn't smoke the whole day or, if he doesn't enjoy a cigarette, he bothers at all.
THE SIX-MONTHS-OX, S1X-MONTHS-OFF SMOKER. (Or 'I can stop whenever I want to. I have done it
thousands of times,') If he enjoys smoking, why does he stop for six months? If he does not enjoy
it, why does he start again? The truth is he is still hooked. Although he gets rid of the physical
addiction, he is left with the main problem - the brainwashing. He hopes each time that he will
stop for good and soon falls for the trap again. Many smokers envy these stoppers and starters.
They think, 'How lucky to be able to control it like that, to smoke when you want to and stop
when you want to,' What they always overlook is that these stoppers and starters aren't controlling
it. When they are smokers, they wish they weren't. They go through the hassle of stopping, then
begin to feel deprived and fall for the trap again, then wish they hadn't. They get the worst of all
worlds. When they are smokers they wish they weren't; when they are non-smokers they wish they
could smoke. If you think about it, this is true all our smoking lives. When we are allowed to
smoke we either take it for granted or wish we didn't. It's only when we can't have cigarettes that
they appear so precious. This is the awful dilemma of smokers. They can never win because
they are moping for a myth, an illusion. There is one way they can win and that is to stop
smoking and stop moping!
THE 'I ONLY SMOKE ON SPECIAL OCCASIONS' SMOKER. Yes, we all do to start with, but
isn't it amazing how the number of occasions seem rapidly to increase and before we know it we seem to
be smoking on all occasions?
THE 'I HAVE STOPPED BUT I HAVE AN OCCASIONAL CIGAR/CIGARETTE'
SMOKER. In a way such smokers are the most pathetic of all. Either they go through their lives
believing they are being deprived or, more often, the occasional cigar becomes two. They remain on
the slippery slope and it goes only one way - DOWNWARDS. Sooner or later they are back to being
heavy smokers. They have fallen again for the very trap that they fell into in the first place.
There are two other categories of casual smoker. The first is the type who smokes just the
occasional cigarette or cigar at social occasions. These people are really non-smokers. They don't
enjoy smoking. It's just that they feel they are missing out. They want to be part of the action. We all
start off like this. Next time the cigars go round, watch how, after a while, the smokers stop lighting
those cigars. Even heavy cigarette smokers can't wait to finish them. They would much rather be
smoking their own brand. The more expensive and the larger the cigar, the more frustrating it is - the
damn thing seems to last all night.
The second category is very rare indeed. In fact, of all the thousands who have sought my
assistance. I can think of only about a dozen examples. The type can best be described by outlining
a recent case.
A woman phoned me, seeking a private session. She is a solicitor, had been smoking for about
twelve years and had never smoked more or less than two cigarettes a day in her smoking life. She
was, incidentally, a very strong-willed lady. I explained that the success rate in group sessions was just
as high as in individual sessions, and in any event I was able to give individual therapy only if the face
were so famous that it would disrupt the group. She began to cry, and I was not able to resist the tears.
The session was expensive; indeed, most smokers would wonder why she wanted to stop in the first
place. They would gladly pay what I charged that lady to be able to smoke only two cigarettes a day.
They make the mistake of assuming that casual smokers are happier and more in control. In control
they may be, but happy they are not. In this case, both the woman's parents had died from lung
cancer before she became hooked. Like me, she had a great fear of smoking before she smoked the first
cigarette. Like me, she eventually fell victim to the massive pressures and tried that first cigarette. Like
me, she can remember the foul taste. Unlike me, who capitulated and became a chain-smoker very
quickly, she resisted the slide.
All you ever enjoy in a cigarette is the ending of the craving for it, whether it be the almost
imperceptible physical craving for nicotine or the mental torture caused by not being allowed to
scratch the itch. Cigarettes themselves are filth and poison. This is why you only suffer the illusion
of enjoying them after a period of abstinence. Just like a hunger or thirst, the longer you suffer it,
the greater the pleasure when you finally relieve it. Smokers make the mistake of believing smoking is
just a habit. They think, 'If 1 can only keep it down to a certain level or smoke only on special
occasions, my brain and body will accept it. I can then keep my smoking at that level or cut down
further should I wish to.' Get it clear in your mind: the 'habit' doesn't exist. Smoking is drug
addiction. The natural tendency is to relieve withdrawal pangs, not to endure them. Even to hold it
at the level you are already at, you would have to exercise willpower and discipline for the rest of your
life because, as your body becomes immune to the drug, it wants more and more, not less and less. As
the drug begins to destroy you physically and mentally, as it gradually breaks down your nervous
system, your courage and confidence, so you are increasingly unable to resist reducing the interval
between each cigarette. That is why. in the early days, we can take it or leave it. If we gel a cold, we
just stop. It also explains why someone like me, who never even suffered the illusion of enjoying
them, had to go on chain-smoking even though every cigarette had become physical torture,
Don't envy that woman. When you smoke only one cigarette every twelve hours it appears to be the
most precious thing on earth. For twelve years that poor woman had been at the centre of a tug of war.
She had been unable to stop smoking, yet was frightened to increase the intake in case she got lung
cancer like her parents. But for twenty-three hours and ten minutes of every one of those days she had to
fight the temptation. It took tremendous willpower to do what she did, and, as I have said, such cases
are rare. But it reduced her to tears in the end. Just look at it logically: either there is a genuine
crutch or pleasure in smoking or there isn't. If there is, who wants to wait an hour, or a day, or a
week? Why should you be denied the crutch or pleasure in the meantime? If there is no genuine
crutch or pleasure, why bother to smoke any of them?
I remember another case, that of a five-a-day man. He started the telephone conversation in a
croaky voice: 'Mr. Carr, I just want to stop smoking before I die.' This is how that man described his
life.
'I am sixty-one years old. I have got cancer of the throat through smoking. Now 1 can only
physically cope with five roll-ups a day.
'I used to sleep soundly through the night. Now I wake up every hour of the night and all I can
think about is cigarettes. Even when I am sleeping. I dream about smoking.
'I cannot smoke my first cigarette until 10 o'clock. I get up at 5 o'clock and make endless cups of tea.
My wife gets up at about 8 o'clock and, because I am so bad-tempered, she will not have me in the
house. I go down to the greenhouse and try to potter about, but my mind is obsessed with smoking. At
9 o'clock I begin to roll my first cigarette and I do so until it is perfect. It is not that I need it to be
perfect, but it gives me something to do. I then wait for 10 o'clock. When it arrives my hands are
shaking uncontrollably. I do not light the cigarette then. If I do, I have to wait three hours for the
next one. Eventually I light the cigarette, take one puff and extinguish it immediately. By continuing
this process I can make the cigarette last one hour. I smoke it down to about a quarter of an inch and
then wait for the next one.'
In addition to his other troubles, this poor man had bur ns all over his lips caused by smoking the
cigarette too low. You probably have visions of a pathetic imbecile. Not so. This man was over six feet
tall and an ex-sergeant in the Marines. He was a former athlete and didn't want to become a smoker.
However, in the last war society believed that cigarettes gave courage, and servicemen were issued free
rations of them. This man was virtually ordered to become a smoker. He has spent the rest of his life
paying through the nose, subsidizing other people's taxes, and it has ruined him physically and
mentally. If he were an animal, our society would have put him out of his misery, yet we still allow
mentally and physically healthy young teenagers to become hooked.
You may think the above case is exaggerated. It is extreme but not unique. There are literally
thousands of similar stories. That man poured his heart out to me, but you can he sure that many of
his friends and acquaintances envied him for being a five-a-day man. If you think this couldn't
happen to you, STOP KIDDING YOURSELF.
IT IS ALREADY HAPPENING.
In any event smokers are notorious liars, even to themselves. They have to be. Most casual
smokers smoke far more cigarettes, and on far more occasions, than they will admit to. I have had
many conversations with so-called five-a-day smokers during which they have smoked more than five
cigarettes in my presence. Observe casual smokers at social events such as weddings and parties.
They will be chain-smoking like the best of them.
You do not need to envy casual smokers. You do not need to smoke. Life is infinitely sweeter
without cigarettes.
Teenagers are generally more difficult to cure, not because they find it difficult to stop but because
either they do not believe they are hooked or they are at the primary stage of the disease and suffer
from the delusion that they will automatically have stopped before the secondary stage.
I would like particularly to warn parents of children who loathe smoking not to have a false sense
of security. All children loathe the smell and taste of tobacco until they become hooked. You did too
at one time. Also do not be fooled by government scare campaigns. The trap is the same as it always
was. Children know that cigarettes kill, but they also know that one cigarette will not do it. At some
stage they may be influenced by a girlfriend or boyfriend, school friend or work colleague. You may
think that all they need is to try one, which will taste horrible and convince them they could never
become hooked.
I find society's failure to prevent our children from becoming addicted to nicotine and other drugs to
be the most disturbing of all of the many disturbing facets of drug addiction. I have given much
thought to this problem and have written a book (Penguin) designed specifically to address the
problem of how to prevent your children from becoming hooked and how to help them escape if they
have already done so. It is a fact that the vast majority of youngsters that become dependent on
heavier drugs are introduced to the concept of chemical dependency by first falling for the nicotine
trap. If you can help them avoid the nicotine trap you will greatly reduce the risk of them becoming
dependent on heavier drugs. I beg you not to be complacent in this matter. It is necessary to protect
youngsters at the earliest possible age and if you have a child. I strongly urge you to read that book.
Even if you suspect your child might already be hooked on a drug, the book will provide excellent
guidance to assist your child to escape.